Limits vs. Boundaries

Limits and boundaries, they seem one in the same... at least according to Webster. I think it's worth our time to consider the limits and boundaries we place on ourselves, in our lives, and at times..... even on those around us.


First off, I'd like to think there is a difference between limits and boundaries. For instance, a limit is something you will not budge on, whereas a boundary is something that can be moved, readjusted, reconsidered, or changed. 


Many times we place limits on ourselves without even consciously realizing it. "I can't do this because....", I can't do that because.....", and then it somehow gets cemented in our thought process that it simply can't be done. Of course this sounds ridiculous, but it happens to people every day, and they live their lives based on these false perceptions, wondering why they're not reaching their goals, and why they're not happy. 


LIMIT. WHO DECIDES WHAT YOUR LIMIT IS? WHY?
Okay, so some limits are set for us, such as speed limits, rules and regulations of the government, etc. What about personal limits though? What have you been taught about your limits? Do you feel you've been raised according to limits? Do you feel limits can and/or should be broken? Do you feel a penalty or a reward of surpassing a limit is warranted, and why? 


I believe it all comes down to what we've been taught. Have you ever challenged your limits? Have you ever been placed in a position where you KNEW you reached your limit, only to discover you had to handle more? How did you feel about it? Did it change your perspective on your limits? I certainly hope so. I meet with clients on a regular basis who tell me their limits, I see otherwise and insist they do things my way. "But I've never lifted that much before.....". They struggle, they swear, some cry, some refuse to do what I've asked. I then refuse to train them. I firmly remind them they came to me to help them, and ask again what they are WILLING to do. 


LIMITS and WILLINGNESS have ALOT in COMMON.


When an individual limits themselves in regards to reaching their goals, they are simply choosing to negotiate their willingness to do what it takes to get there. Excuses are lame. Yes, there are some legitimate reasons why some things can't be accomplished, but they are an exception. The majority of the time, people are simply coming up with excuses, and reasoning why they are not doing what they set out to do.  


Let's place limits where limits belong, shall we? Such as: Acceptable and unacceptable behavior, rules and regulations to keep our country running smoothly, keep freedom alive, and protecting our rights, our families, and our beliefs.


Let's set boundaries for the rest. Boundaries can fluctuate. Let's set goals, and keep at them amidst the obstacles that come our way. You see, when a person sets a goal in terms of limits, and they run into a snag, it's an excuse to bail. When you set boundaries, you simply modify your plan, and keep moving forward.  Boundaries allow for flexibility, flexibility of both mind, body, and the manner in which a course is traveled. Say you set a time limit on reaching your goal. This is good as we need to have some type of accountability to measure our progress with in terms of time, however, if illness has struck, injury, a loss of job, etc., you need not bail when the date arrives and you haven't reached your goal(s), you simply modify the plan and continue forth. 


IF YOUR GOAL IS THAT IMPORTANT TO YOU, NOTHING WILL STOP YOU FROM REACHING IT.  There are no excuses.


BOUNDARIES
One thing about boundaries you need to be aware of:


IF YOU DO NOT SET YOUR OWN BOUNDARIES, 
SOMEONE ELSE WILL SET THEM FOR YOU!


Is this what you want? Someone else determining when you'll wake? What you'll eat? Where you'll work? I think not. There are some things in life that can only be determined by YOU. YOU are your own steward. Yes, we can ask for others opinion, but when it comes down to it, only YOU can decide what is best for YOU. Take a passive personality, for instance. A passive person is one who has not yet learned to set their own boundaries. You've seen it a million times, people being asked to do this or that, and whether they want to or not, need to or not, have time for it or not, they comply. No boundaries. 


My word of advice:
Know what you want in life before your feet hit the floor in the morning. Set your boundaries, yet be flexible. Then walk to the nearest mirror and reconfirm your goals, boundaries, and limits with the person you're looking at, as they are most likely the one to be your biggest challenge. Yes, people set their goals, and silently go about destroying their own plan by making contradictive choices throughout the day. 


Here's my challenge to you: Set your goals, and live up to them for just one day. Then do it the next, and the next, and the next. Yes, it's difficult if you're leaving your comfort zone, but this is how great things come to pass.


Health