Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Who Do You Want to Become: 2016

As a parent, we find ourselves constantly pondering how we can supply the best in life for our child(ren): mentally, emotionally, physically, and in spirit, to not only survive in this world, but to thrive, have joy, and live a healthy, prosperous, insightful life that will have an impact on both them self, and those around them, for good. We carefully parent, teach, set an example, educate, guide, and monitor on a consistent basis their growth, struggles, accomplishments, what is being put into their body, their minds, the influences about them, what they read, watch, their hygiene, study, and sleep habits, their activities, hobbies, friends, as well as, their future college, trade, etc., that we may somehow lead them on a path to success, and successful planning and decision making, so they may take over gradually with insight of their own. 


Reread the above paragraph again, and deeply consider what value you place upon these things with yourself.

I encourage you to mindfully create who you desire to be, and what you desire to accomplish in the next year. After all, look at year after year that has gone by. Do you feel you’ve ever really planned, plotted, and executed to your fullest ability who and what you desired to become? 2016 might just well be the most significant year in your life depending on if you choose to actively create and participate in your life, or if one chooses to simply ‘ride the tide’, and wait and see what life has to offer them, day by day. 

The difference here lies within taking control, hence, responsibility, for the outcome vs. responding to one’s environment, and the perceived demands thereof, day in and day out. 

This is what I refer to as the ‘cookie cutter’ method:

  • Wake-up same time each day with the same thoughts.
  • Go to work (be it at home, office, etc.,)
  • Fulfill responsibilities
  • Get daily necessities done, and so forth.
  • Call it a day.

I used to live this way. It’s very easy to fall into this trap whether you have a lot of kids, or not. School, work, laundry, dishes, meal prep, sports, activities, yard work, scouts, girls programs, and the list goes on, and on, and on. One day, I woke up and realized that unless I made the effort to do something for myself, above and beyond the ‘call of duties’, it wasn’t going to happen. No one was checking in on me out of concern to make sure I was eating ‘right’, getting enough sleep, or God forbid, ask what else I might desire to accomplish in life. 

Raising a family is a most remarkable experience, however, unless I made the effort to do something more, it would be all I did. I was content doing this for many, many, years. I examined my life day by day, for a week, and discovered I could be kept going from task to task, from person to person, from the time I woke to the time I went to bed, often with little sleep, running and fulfilling what appeared to be on ‘demand’. 

This is when I discovered the power of thoughtful planning coupled with desire and intent. I began getting up even  earlier, planning, studying, etc., and before I knew it, I had classes lined up,  workshops to attend, and places to travel…… and years later I did indeed travel to where I needed to go, gained further education, began three home businesses, and earned a Doctorate in the process, all while raising 5-6 kids at home, homeschooling them, and having many responsibilities outside the home. Now that I think about it, it makes me dizzy, hahaha!

Seriously now, who do you want to be? We all know there are things about us whether mentally, spiritually, emotionally, or physically that we would either like to change or know we could improve on. There are also many characteristics that can be weaved into our beings that are of benefit for all: Kindness, charity, love, thoughtfulness, hard working, caring, organized,  competent, creative, disciplined, focused, courageous, the desire for continuous education, and so forth. 

Who do you want to become, and what do you want to accomplish in 2016?



                  CLARITY IS POWER

Clarity helps distinguish, clearly, what you want from what you do not want. Therefore, you recognize immediately that which is not what you want rather than staying in a situation for months or years, or traveling in a direction off the path, before coming to the conclusion that ‘it’ is not what you want, nor is it working for you.

Just as well, one realizes easily what IS working for them. When one has clarity, things, situations, and people are easily identified as something that IS working for them, on the path to who they desire to become, and it brings them joy and enthusiasm, which further motivates them to press forward. Obstacles, become learning opportunities, which often provide further opportunities for growth.

To help clarify things for you, start with a blank piece of paper and write down what you don’t want: be it related to a career, relationship, finances, health, fitness, and so forth. Let your past experiences be your guide. Surely, you have learned a thing or two through the years. Clearly what you do not want, that simple.

Next, on another sheet of paper begin listing all you  do want and be very detailed and specific. You’d like a new car? What kind, year, color, and so forth. Mate? What kind of personality are you interested in? Outgoing, reserved, health conscious, supportive, etc. Career, where you want to live, what you want to drive, how you want to expand your business, start a charity, characteristics you want to develop within yourself….. the possibilities are endless!!!!

So, why live the same day 365 days a year when one has so many options? 

Decide what you want. Believe it. Set out to achieve it, and it WILL happen.

After you finish your ‘do want’ list, pull one more sheet of paper and make a dream list. Just do it. Nothing is out of bounds, everything is open to the imagination. Let it flow like water.

Now, that you know exactly what you want and what you do not want, you can have the pleasure of burning your do not want list, or cross through each entry one by one, etc. This way you’re sending a clear message to both your conscious and sub-conscious mind that these items are non-desirable. This way, as soon as you encounter such, you will be prompted to take heed, proceed with caution. The mind is reminding you of your commitment to pass on the do not want list, this brings clarity when one realizes they have a choice: 1) ignore the caution signs and enter a domain that will take you off the path OR 2) see it for what it is, and turn your attention elsewhere, preferably, to something on your list you do want. If there isn’t anything, turn your attention to your Mantra.


their newest mantra is "stay connected": slogan, motto, maxim, catchphrase, catchword, watchword, byword, buzzword, tag (line).

“I don’t stop for obstacles, I destroy them!”

or as my friend always says: 

“Looking good, feeling good, out to be in Hollywood”

So, who do you want to become, and where do you want to go in your life? You are the single greatest project (outside of raising kids), that you will ever encounter, should you choose to do so. Many never even try. Others give up too easily, let’s face it, the path to growth is always the one that requires fortitude, regression or  stagnation requires very little effort, if any. 

Be passionate about life.

Have courage.

Express gratitude daily.

Find the best in every situation.

Follow through on your inspired thoughts.

Move forward in confidence.

If you would like, get a good friend to become ‘accountability buddies’, share what your goals are for the day, month, or week and check in with one another to find out how things are going, brainstorm, compliment one another on progress made, and so forth.

I have a great friend who works with me on this. She never judges me, accepts me for who I am, supports me in my endeavors, and is full of great suggestions. She says the same about me, lol, so we truly are on each others team and it makes life and working through our list of goals and ‘wants’, interesting. It also gives perspective when you realize everyone generally encounters some of the same obstacles just unique in their presentation. Everyone has their ups and not so ups, times of great momentum, and times to reflect and regroup.  

Last, but not least. Believe in yourself. Believe in the process, and be willing to let go of fixations on how things ‘should’ be, and allow yourself the freedom to try new things.

The best to you and yours in 2016!

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Goal Setting

Goal Setting for the New Year
What are you setting out to accomplish in 2016?

“A good archer is known not by his arrows but by his aim.”
Thomas Fuller

And so it is with goal setting. One can have many lofty goals, but without direction to keep one on the path, they can become lost along the way, easily distracted, or end up giving up. Taking time to evaluate key components of our life, and making a plan to foster further
growth and achievement, gives one purpose, direction, and a priceless sense of accomplishment, once fulfilled.

A common practice I began with our children 20 years ago, was to sit down together and plot out goals for the year covering many aspects of life. I began this when they were but five years old. It’s proven to be nothing short of amazing. At the end of each year, we will gather round and pull out our goal sheets that we filled out at the end of the previous December, and one by one, go through them and share what each was able to accomplish. Those who didn’t want to share didn’t have to.

Many times over the years, there has been a child (now grown adults), that have even been hesitant to look at their old sheet in fear they had done nothing to accomplish what they had set out to do. I would always encourage them to look anyway, and when they did.... were they ever in for a surprise. They had many times, not only reached their goals, but surpassed them.

We continue this practice to this day. If my kids friends, new husbands, boyfriends are over at the house when we do this, they are welcome to join in, but seldom do. They sit in silence as everyone else scratches on their sheets in deep contemplation. I often wondered what they thought about during that time, and would send them home with a goal sheet ‘Just in case’ they decided to fill it out after all. I have been pleasantly surprised to find each one of them filled theirs out, they just needed their own space and time to do it.

I encourage you to do the same. There is something powerful that happens when one writes something down. First off, it saves us the trouble of trying to remember everything, hahaha! Seriously, it is taking a thought that is in your head, in the invisible world, and the moment you write it down, you have just brought it into the physical world. What’s even more powerful is when you ACT on what you have written with the intent to fulfill it. B.A.M! Powerful stuff my friends.

"In absence of clearly defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily acts of trivia."   -Unknown

Here are some areas for consideration when setting goals for yourself for 2016:

Professional Educational
Creative things (Hobby, etc.) Spiritual
Material object(s)

"Life can be pulled by goals just as surely as it can be pushed by drives."   - Viktor Frankl

Once you’ve decided what areas you’re interested in setting a goal for yourself, prioritize them. Then simply start at the top of your list. I like to write the goal on a 3x5 card and leave it someplace I will be reminded to read it. Then I wear a bracelet on my left arm, and once I’ve completed a task towards my goal each day (whether it’s a phone call, google search, research, errand, etc.), I move the bracelet to my right arm. People ask, “Why do you always wear so many bracelets?” I tell them, “Because I like to”, to keep things simple, but the truth is, I have a lot of goals, and am actively working on them each day.

Find a method that works for you. Some people like day planners, others a pocket notebook, iPhone, iPad, i-whatever.

The momentum of taking action is key to putting things into motion. Soon you will find the obstacles that appear here and there become something you can learn even more by, in other words, when most people stop and give up when a set back occurs, you realize there is something to be gained by the obstacle being there and delve in to get to the bottom of it, never allowing your goal to leave your sight.

I wish you all a very happy, healthy, prosperous New Year!!!!!


Monday, December 21, 2015


Becoming Unstoppable  
The Art of Overcoming One’s Self and Self Perceived Limitations

“Our minds are infinite vessels, fashioned by the thoughts we think.” 
-Jill Nix

Therefore, one would be wise to carefully examine that which he/she allows to flow freely within.

Either we shall rule our thoughts, and in turn, our life, or that which runs rampant within will manifest without, leading to chaos, confusion, lack of peace, and understanding.

The art of becoming unstoppable is simple. The transformation that must take place is what many perceive to be insurmountable, unattainable, and even impossible. Thusly, this is where we begin…. perception. 

As Henry Ford said, “Whether you think you can, or can’t, you’re usually right.” 

            Becoming unstoppable has one requirement:   

In this one venture, overcoming of self, you become unstoppable. How, you ask? I cannot possibly explain it in it’s entirety, as much of it will only come through one’s desire to suffer the hardship, feeling of displacement, loneliness, discomfort, pain, and many other undesirable emotions and feelings, as well as, the indescribable joy, peace, and inner strength that comes with no longer identifying with the ego, or being distracted by the three dimensional world we live in. Too deep? Perhaps. Perhaps not.

Overcome one’s:
  • Insecurities
  • Fears
  • Perceived boundaries
  • Perceived limitations
  • Phobias
  • Lack of confidence
  • Jealousy
  • Feelings of worthlessness
and the list goes on, and on, and on. Face these demons with lighted intent and they will vanish as you act to eliminate them from your life.

  • Love
  • Peace
  • Honor
  • Integrity
  • Truth
and allow your inner being to flourish.
Overcoming self requires one to take an honest look at their life, self, and preoccupations. What serves you? What enslaves you? Trust me, you are making choices that both serve you and enslave you. All must be carefully examined. 

What brings you true happiness? Peace? What brings you unhappiness? These must all be addressed. Every single element in your life that brings dysfunction to self must be addressed, dealt with, faced squarely, overcome, and released. 

We live in a society where 50% of all marriages end in divorce. Drugs run rampant, alcohol, porn, gambling, and other addictions (some deemed socially ‘acceptable’, such as food and sugar addiction, gaming, sports, etc.), are all outward manifestations of dysfunction. These must all be addressed.

This requires one to face the hurts, the pains, the denial of love and affection, the un-acceptance, ridicule, loneliness, and the many other emotions that have been buried under a false front. Feelings buried alive never die, instead people slowly commit suicide by their daily thoughts toward self and others, through excessive eating and/or drinking, drugs, porn, and so forth. 

                                                               DEATH DOES NOT

There are many willing to die for a cause, but few willing to live 100%. Why? Does man fear life? Does man fear the effort required to march forth day by day? From whence does ones strength come from?

Death is not the greatest loss in life, the greatest loss is what dies inside while still alive.

Think of how many people have gone to the grave never realizing their potential. 

Do you realize your potential? Do you feel it stirring you from time to time? Does it stir you to contemplate? Set goals? Make a commitment? Take action? If so, why? 
If not, why not?

For a great deal of the population, the fear of death is only surpassed  by the fear of living!

Living, truly living then, is overcoming self. By overcoming self, any good you set out to do is then magnified 100 fold.  Imagine the possibilities. Are you one who fears what lies within? Are you ready to embrace life? 

Are you willing, ready, and desiring to become UNSTOPPABLE?

Many desire, but as the Warrior, few shall succeed. 

In the process of becoming unstoppable, one soon realize’s they must surrender to One who is Greater and has a greater vision, knowledge base, and Ultimate Wisdom. For man alone is but a leaf on a tree. Take a close look at the tree on the front page, it represents one’s journey to becoming unstoppable. It seems to stand alone, through the winds, the rains, the snows, the storms of life, if you will. Many may pass by and acknowledge the tree, perhaps, no one will. This tree must surrender it’s will to One of a Greater each day. The sun sends warmth, rain nourishes, the earth provides it’s foundation. Through each storm it weathers, it becomes stronger.

Pain, like fear, is to be acknowledged, dealt with, surrendered, and released. That which one determines to hold onto which is destructive in nature, will ultimately destroy them.

Begin where you are. Overcoming one’s self is the art of mastering one’s self. Begin where you are: Make a good bed. Ingest live, healthy foods. Speak kindly and think kindly of self and others. Serve someone daily not out of obligation, but rather, desire. Experiment upon these words. If hitting snooze, and thinking Mondays a drag when you open your eyes, start with getting up with a smile on your face. Have your day plan and prime goals ready to be accomplished. Be flexible because the Universe has it’s own way of ‘interrupting’ our plans to teach us something greater, of priceless value, and it often happens when we perceive it to be most inconvenient.

This was a rather deep subject that I ever so lightly touched on, however, I truly desire it motivates you to take action in your life, daily. Have joy. Share love.


Have a wonderful week. 



Friday, December 18, 2015







Wednesday, December 9, 2015


"Being a Warrior is not about the act of fighting. It is about the ability, courage, and commitment to end the war within oneself and not quit until the job is done." - M. Machowicz

May peace be with you Mr. Mack. You are an inspiration to many, and your influence cannot be underestimated. You, my friend, are a true Warrior.

Monday, December 7, 2015


OPINION: beliefjudgmentthought(s)(way of) thinkingmind(point of) viewviewpointoutlookattitudestancepositionperspectivepersuasionstandpointsentimentconceptionconviction.
An opinion is just that, an opinion. It has nothing to do with you. It was not formed by you, created by you, endorsed by you, approved by you, or in ANY way attached to you....... UNLESS....... YOU CHOOSE TO BELIEVE IT!!!!If you choose to believe the opinion of another, especially anything that comes through the air, then you have just given up your personal power. You have just wandered into the fold of the sheep, no longer making your own decisions, creating your life, creating the new. Instead, you're just following the herd, whomever the shepherd may be, if there even is a shepherd. Many times sheep find themselves open to the wolves that pass their way, they are vulnerable.When one is a wolf, they have focus, drive, ambition, and a keen sense of awareness. They identify the tracks of others easily, and can quickly track them, if necessary. Think for yourself. Whoever has an opinion, owns the opinion, it is not yours. Many times, it is but a reflection of the person giving it. However, there are times when an opinion might very well hold some element of truth to it. One would be wise to examine the opinion for any truth to be found. One must not be afraid to open the door to truth, and if some element of truth lies within the opinion, then it is your responsibility to deal with it in a way which will only bring you further personal growth. Sometimes an element of truth can be seeded amongst lies and heresies. Take what applies and allow the rest to pass.The only time one should listen to the opinion of another is when it is from a person they highly respect, find honorable, integrous, honest, has experience from which to base an unbiased opinion from, and can remain objective. And this is ONLY if they have asked them for their opinion, or are searching for their opinion.Of course, all this is simply my opinion, hahaha! Take it for what it's worth to you.As a Professional Trainer and Lifestyle Coach, I'm asked frequently for an opinion. I give it freely, unbiasedly, and with love. The truth is seldom easy to hear. The fleeting, flattering compliments whether based on truth or not, are much more easily digested. “All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great deal more robust, sophisticated and well supported in logic and argument than others.” 
― Douglas AdamsThe Salmon of Doubt
“When a man gives his opinion, he's a man. When a woman gives her opinion, she's a bitch.” 
― Bette Davis
“If someone isn't what others want them to be, the others become angry. Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.” 
― Paulo CoelhoThe Alchemist