MIND SET
Jill Nix N.H.D., M.H., T.B.M.
Special thanks to J.R./Crew
“Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed no hope at all.”
- Dale Carnegie
mind·set or mind-set (mīnd′sĕt′) n.
1. A fixed mental attitude or disposition that predetermines a person's responses to and interpretations of situations.
2. An inclination or a habit.
Mind Set
I’m choosing to separate the word mindset into two distinct words to help further illustrate its meaning: The mind is literally ‘set’ apart on various attitudes, behaviors, thoughts, assumptions, learning styles, preferences of all kinds; food, drink, mate, hobbies, homes, automobiles, hairstyle, clothing, television programs, music, etc., to politics, economics, education, healthcare, parenting, travel, and on, and on, it goes. One’s mindset is literally the basis from which ALL decisions, beliefs, actions, and understanding are based. It is the ground from which one has firmly sunk their feet in as a giant redwood tree, to ultimately determine what is ‘good, ‘bad’, in between, and steer the individual’s life for all their days.
With this in mind (no pun intended), would it not be wise then to frequently assess one’s mindset? Say you willingly allowed another individual to make literally ALL your decisions for you, for your whole life. Would you not carefully choose WHO this individual would be? Of course you would!!!!!
Likewise, one needs to frequently assess their mindset.
WHERE DOES ONE’S MIND SET COME FROM?
We each come with our very own mindset, however, through one’s upbringing, mindset is swayed and conditioned ever so subtly (or perhaps, in some cases, not so subtle at all). Parents, friends, neighbors, teachers, television, movies, books, newspapers, magazines, even such things as the internet with its easy access, can pull up an array of articles that read through enough, can change alter one’s mindset.
However, the mindset unique to the individual never leaves, although it can be deeply buried. You can look within your own family and find similarities of mindset, but you can also find stark differences, as well.
It’s common for me to ask my coaching clients to watch the movie, “The Truman Show”, starring Jim Carrey. It’s about a man who was born and immediately, put up for adoption. A movie director adopted him with the sole intention on making a television show of his life, without the kid ever knowing about it. The director set up a small studio, hired actors and actresses, and it was televised from day one. Soon, the babe grew to a child, and a child to teen, and teen to a working adult. His ‘wife’ was a hired actress, as was his best friend. The set by this point grows to an enormous size, with street lay-outs, and so forth, and is all enclosed in a huge dome where the artificial sun rises and sets, and weather can be manipulated…… but Truman believes this is real, however, he has nano moments where something just doesn’t seem to be right (his internal mindset getting his attention), but he can’t quite put his finger on it, so he decides to start paying more attention to what is going on in the world around him; the people, environment, and so forth. It has a delightful outcome, as he finally discovers the truth. Good flick, check it out, as much can be learned from this simple movie.
Just as Truman, we are all more or less, raised the same way. We take for granted what mom and dad tell us is true, what we’re taught in school is true, and we believe it because this is what everyone does, and it simply is just how life ‘IS’. Or is it?
“Mindset is how a person is predisposed to look at reality, and that predisposition can’t really be laid out on a piece of paper. It is not an organized step by step program. But nevertheless, it is mindset, and it is the way a person views reality.
This mindset, ultimately, organizes one’s reality. Not only does it organize the
aspects of it, the basic components of it, but it also places limitations on it, as if to say reality can go this far, but no further. ” - J.R.
People who have similar mindsets often find they have much to talk about. People who do not share a similar mindset can find their relationship a bumpy road if they are not willing to understand the others ‘perspective’, meaning mindset, or it can be a real learning experience, and provide for further growth if both individuals are willing to be open to the possibilities.
I believe the divorce rate would be much different then one out of every two marriages surviving, and for many that still remain married, that is exactly how they view it, as survival. This is the first indication of importance, as a society, that mindset plays in one’s life, and the huge impact it has on outcomes of an entire society.
Marriage is a topic in and of itself, however, I will say this; many marriages fail because one of the partners has begun to shift their mindset. The other partner then has one of two reactions:
- Be open to the mindset and try to understand where the other is coming from, or
- Be offended by the change in mindset, take it personal, remain fixated on their own mindset (not willing to even consider any other options, as they know they are right, and so forth). This is where trouble begins.
Partners in a marriage have a choice at this point. The one who is changing their mindset either learns to be quiet about it and do things separately from their spouse to keep things ‘peaceful’, or they ‘stay the course’, and continue on their way regardless of what their spouse feels about it. Remaining quiet to appease one’s ego only causes one to suppress how they really feel, and they will not be happy with their marriage in the end.
By speaking up and living the new mindset, they feel freedom, yet it causes friction within the marriage. This is just one example of how mindset can impact a persons life.
Mindset implies how one feels, how things are set up, how things operate and what one is supposed to do or needs to do, to navigate their limited picture of reality.
“Well, I go here, and then I should do this, and then, if that happens over there then I should try and do that”, you know, people try to navigate the best they can given their mindset.” - J.R.
THE CON’S OF A ‘SET’ MIND:
People are dedicated to their mindset, they pledge allegiance to their mindset, loyalty, and bow down to their mindset. They pretend there is nothing else to see except what their own mindset shows them.
For many, making the effort to really understand another’s mindset or attempt to change the basic structure of the nature of reality in any way at all, would be ‘strange’, ‘weird’, ‘futile’, ‘puzzling’, and even confusing, as it is asking that person to leave their cherished, cozy, comfort zone.
Billions of people have tremendously dense, heavy, mindsets.
“Well, this is reality, this is my life….. , I mean here it is, this is what you’ve got to work with, this is ‘the hand’ you’ve been dealt with.”
Mindset can be your personal key to unlimited experiences, education, and personal growth, or it can be your biggest barrier to living a full, creative, adventurous life.
All of this is rarely observed by the person himself. Within their mindset lies the ‘operating instructions’ that one goes by, but doesn’t frequently investigate it with any serious intent, if at all.
HOW TO GET OUT OF ‘CONDITIONED’, INGRAINED MINDSET
The easiest way to ‘get out of the box’, is to start looking where you do not usually look. Question everything in your reality. Just because someone wrote a textbook doesn’t mean it’s truth, hell anyone can write a book, and they do. Think for a moment about my newsletter on SKEWED PERCEPTIONS, particularly, the few paragraphs about who makes the laws, and owns the media, and politicians. Well, guess what? These same people also ‘own’ the educational system, and have for a very, very, long time!!!! That’s right. These wealthy people (who got wealthy by deceiving masses of people via perception/mindset), created organizations such as the National Education Association (NEA), and many other organizations and publishing houses that have ‘their’ people writing the books, tests, teaching modules, and the finished product called curriculum, such as Common Core. Don’t believe me? I’ve done my homework, perhaps, you will do yours.
Now, say you had the funds to do the same thing. Imagine the difference in the outcome of the education of an entire nation. Do you not see where this has a tremendous impact on not only one’s mindset, but an entire nation? Let’s say history books contain less than 1% truth. Even if you do not believe this, just ‘pretend’ it’s true for a moment…. you can’t help but wonder, “So, just what in the world is the history of this nation? World?” Hmmm.
I throw this out there because this is exactly what opens up a CAN of worms for you to start looking at, and allow your mind to expand. Let’s face it, how many people question their ‘reality’?
You must realize, one sets their mindset largely upon what ‘exists’. Period. If it exists, it’s real, and therefore a position of mind can be taken accordingly, but if it cannot be seen, heard, touched, etc., no one talks about it, well…. it doesn’t exist unless we read about it, or watch a movie…… and just who’s writing the material? Making the movies? The same jokers running a number of scams that people believe to be ‘legit’.
Are you getting the picture?
Okay, I’ve taken the long route to convey a simple yet profound lesson on mindset. Now, let’s move on to how this affects you:
- Are you married?
- Looking for a partner?
- Have kids? The more kids, the more complex the mindset equation becomes.
- Have values? Morals?
- Goals?
- Eat?
- Drink?
- Train?
The list is as long as there are things that exist (that you both comprehend, and do not yet comprehend).
Your mindset can hold you prisoner, cost you pain, or bring you joy, growth, and be the driving force behind each and every one of your successes.
In fact, working with people for over three decades, I can testify to you first hand how the goals of many athletes, business people, teachers, entertainer’s and health care professionals (to name a few), were like a horse with a carrot dangling in front of their face. They worked hard, very, very hard… for years, but never really got a grip on actually reaching that one goal they strived for in numerous ways over the years, until they began to change their mindset.
I asked them, purposely, to read material contrary to what they believed, agreed with, and so forth. I had others in the media go out and interview people whose position on a topic was controversial to their own.
I’ve asked writers to write something completely different from anything they’ve ever done, such as write about a day in the life of a telephone, etc.
Sound silly? So be it, because it works!!!!! But as I always tell you:
“Believe nothing you read, nothing you hear, and only half of what you see.”
Take no one’s word for anything, including mine!!!!! Check it all out yourself, and come to your own conclusions. Don’t have time? Then make time, it’s THAT important.
Who you are, and everything about you, and the tapestry of your life, is all engineered via your mindset. Are there things to set your mind on as ‘IT’? Of course, living the LAWS, as originally intended could very well be a basis for mindset, outside of that, I honestly can not find anything that doesn’t deserve investigation. Even the LAWS deserve investigation. You do not know what they have to offer you unless you actually live them.
I love the above quote. It is TRUTH! To see what one has not, or cannot see, means
ONE MUST USE THEIR IMAGINATION!!!!
This is what Ford did, Edison did, Emerson, the under-acknowledged Tesla, along with every great artist, entertainer, scientist, engineer, and every other truly successful person.
A friend of mine has desired to win a medal at the Olympics for
years!!!! She has trained relentlessly throughout, and is at the age where this is her last shot. I encourage her every time we’re together to look at things differently then she has in the past, in hopes it will help her develop a new mindset in conjunction with her goal. She’s made the Olympic Team once already, but didn’t receive the medal she has wanted for such a long time. She didn’t make the Team this year but has a shot at making a New World Record. M.I.N.D.S.E.T.
Whether it’s muscle you want to put on, or fat you want to lose, make a team, become Spec Op, begin exercising, or improve your eating habits, take the time to evaluate your mindset. Also, know the ‘why’ you want to do it. It has got to have passion and meaning behind it, or it will wither as a flower without water.
No matter what you are currently doing and striving to achieve, fulfill, and make a reality in your life, your mindset is the key.
Happy Day!
PS - If I can be of assistance in assisting you with ‘breaking out of the box’, please, contact me.
Health!
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